Stop Attaching Your Happiness to People and Things

How many times have you said “If I could just have … I’d finally be happy”?

You probably said it this morning when you woke up for work as you wished for 100 million dollars so you could quit your job and tell your boss where to shove your last paycheck. We’re constantly bombarded with advertisements for products we don’t need. We scroll through our timelines and are force fed pictures of lovey dovey couples and we feel two emotions: envy of their fairy tale romance and longing for fulfillment through an intimate bond with a significant other. Life would be so much better if we could have what we want. These are all external goals and there’s nothing wrong with wanting more for yourself. However, the happiness these things bring is fleeting and it never brings the contentment you thought it would.

Once you finally get what it is you set out for you will often tragically find that it’s hardly ever as good as you expected. Ladies, have you ever gotten that guy you’ve been desperately flirting with just to find out he’s a clingy pushover? Guys, have you ever dated that girl you’ve been instagram stalking just to find she’s shallow and annoying? What about those of you who finally got that high paying job and only after a few months asked yourselves, “where’d all my money go?” As I said before, there’s nothing wrong with wanting more for yourself, you should have these aspirations because you deserve it. Just understand that there’s something you need to realize that’s way more important than actually attaining these things.

It’s about the journey.

When you tell yourself you want something, you’re essentially setting a goal for yourself. Setting goals ignites a fire within you, you’re working towards something. This gives you purpose. When you want something you don’t have, you’re forced to grow. You have to do what you’ve never done to get what you’ve never had and this sets you on your personal mission of acquisition (I like that one).

Once you get what you wanted you experience an abundance of joy, you’re walking on air.  However, it’s not the actual object of your desire that brings you joy, it’s the contentment of knowing your hard work has paid off. You’ve been hitting the gym, updated your wardrobe, and finally got that girl. You picked up extra work, saved up your money and finally bought your dream car. Congratulations, you did it!

Accomplishing these goals you’ve set for yourself gives you proof that you actually can do something if you put your mind to it. This builds self confidence. Once you reach one goal, you should use that momentum to set another and continue the process. This is why the rich get richer; they love the challenge and are confident enough in themselves to pursue endeavors that push them out of their comfort zone and forces them to grow.

You should want more for yourself, it’s encouraged. Just realize that it’s the journey of self discovery and growth that is the real reward. That “thing” you want is just a trophy of your hard work!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s